I left out the “”About You” section about me here blank. It feels too much like a personal ad, and that triggers me too much.
The last time I put a personal ad out online it was a fucking disaster. I ended up with a reply from one man who referred to me in the third person. “I need me a female between the age of 19 and 25 and require it to be 5′ 5″ and 120 pounds.”
Oh I’m sorry. Did you just say “it” you sick son-of-fa-bitch? Because I’m going to wager that the last time you saw a ‘female’ was the storm of 78′. Yeah remember? as you dragged her dead corpse behind your oversized-duel exhaust jacked-up truck with that long metal chain after you chloroformed her and clunked her about her head with a crow bar? back to your Branch Davidian Style compound for a night of good ol Square dancing and necrophilia fun.
Mmmmmm, yeah….does that ring a bell now?
Men who refer to women as “it” and “female” as if they are specimens scare me. There is a level of objectification that is just downright frightening. Almost as scary was the reply I got from a man living in his mom’s basement. No, he wasn’t down on his luck, he had never left…..like ever. Very Norman Bates-esque. Any man who feels comfortable banging his date while his mom listens to her squeal like a pig…..well, the cogs just aren’t firing right upstairs. Just sayin. A little too close to home I’m thinkin, in a cousins with dozens sort of way. (shivers).
I always thought the perfect man was Fred Rogers. He was my hero. You know Mr. Rogers Neighborhood? I go to an Al-anon meeting with a woman who knew him and she said he was just as nice in person as he was on the show.
I cried for a long time when he died.
*Raises glass to Mr.Rogers*